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Troy Sends Out Fleet Of Elegant Pianos To Be Inevitably Destroyed By Environment

TROY — Art. It’s everywhere. It’s in our homes. It’s in our favorite restaurants. It’s even in our bathrooms. And guess what? It’s in Troy, too.

Every summer, the city of Troy organizes a series of “Sculptures on the Square” to be displayed throughout the town. They’ve exhibited everything from tiny airplanes, to a colossal depiction of our former president, Abraham Lincoln. This year, they’ve taken it upon themselves to paint some pianos, and place them outside; completely defenseless, and undoubtedly afraid.

The pianos, which are normally used for playing music, but are also being used as a canvas for visual expression, have been put on display to be inevitably destroyed by their surrounding environment.

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Local storm cloud, Thor Tempest, says he won’t be holding back any rain this year.

“Look buddy, I have A LOT of shit to dump, and there’s just no way that I’m about to hold off for a few minutes so these pianos can be in good condition after this summer. Sorry bro, but it’s just not happening.”

Thor isn’t the only one who doesn’t really give two shits about these divine concoctions of creativity and craftsmanship.

Pickle Rick enthusiast, Peter Johnson, has been playing “Brick” by Ben Folds Five for hours on the Dr. Suess piano while drinking a pack of Piss Pilsners. AND he’s been setting his beer down ON the piano with NO coaster to protect it.

The Dr. Suess piano on its first day in hell
The Dr. Suess piano on its first day in hell

These poor pianos unfortunately have a long road ahead of them, and there’s nothing we can do to stop it from getting worse. I suppose all we can do is sit back, and let it happen.

The painted pianos are located on the Miami County Courthouse Plaza, Prouty Plaza and on the Southeast Quadrant of the Public Square in downtown Troy. They will stay downtown through August for anyone to play free of charge.

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