INCOMING: Barrage of Facemasks Headed Toward Miami County

INCOMING: Barrage of Facemasks Headed Toward Miami County

MIAMI COUNTY – Local meteorologists report that a barrage of facemasks is headed toward Miami County later this evening. High winds are expected to carry thousands of masks northbound towards Miami County, from the Dayton area where masks are being mandated by the state. 

“Folks, you’re going to want to stay inside if you don’t want to wear a mask,” says MCBC’s Chief Meteorologist Hubert Schrodum. “They’ll land right on your face and there’s not much you’ll be able to do about it.”

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Advice from MCBC’s meteorologists also mirrors advice from the CDC, Mike DeWine,and Lance Himes, Ohio Department of Health Director. After all, we’re still in the middle of a pandemic with well over 67,000 Covid cases in Ohio alone. 

Locals are showing strong resistance to the barrage of facemasks.

“I ain’t wearing no damn mask. And mother nature can’t put one on me. I will weather this storm and die if I have to,” says Richard Felton-Simmons of Piqua. 

Climate change deniers are also speaking up about the incoming barrage, saying that it’s “scientifically impossible” and part of a “larger agenda.” Well guess what folks, the Miami County Bugle Caller has a highly qualified team of meteorologists and infectious disease doctors. If you can’t handle the truth, go read the Troy Daily News or something. 

Subscribe to the Miami County Bugle Caller for more updates on weather and public health.

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Mario Cheltingham

MCBC Business Insider Analyst. Former Muncie Business Journal Editor-In-Chief. Striving to create a more prosperous business climate.

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