Donnelsville, OH – Miami County has officially staked claim of Donnelsville, Ohio. In a recent press release, county representative Steve Twellman stated that “this is only the beginning,” expressing plans to “eventually make the entire Miami Valley part of Miami County. That’s imperialism. That’s Miami.”
Donnelsville is home to a mere 200 residents. The village contains a post office and 1 gas station. In a forgotten corner of Clark County, the village hasn’t seen much excitement in its history. Miami County representatives believe that will soon change.
“We’re tearing down a few residential areas to build a water park. That sounds pretty fun to me,” stated Twellman. “It also creates jobs, I think.”
Miami County claimed the village after sending a threatening message to Clark County municipal offices through an email which threatened to hover acid rain clouds over the county. After two days with no response, Miami County representatives placed a flag at the Donnelsville Post Office, making the annex official.
“It was pretty easy. Almost too easy, but there’s no such thing. Our work is not yet done here. It’s time to get the boys and a few cranes so we can wreck some buildings on independence day,” stated Twellman. “I think Enon could be next, but we’re not really that interested.”
Demolition will begin in early July.